Unreal Nature

May 28, 2009

It’s About Time!

Filed under: Uncategorized — unrealnature @ 7:30 am

“For too long, game designers have been creatively stymied by a mammary-imaging technology only capable of rendering one type of breast — a heaving pair of massive, gravity-defying, torpedo-shaped bosoms,” said Warren Hood, developer of the new Vex9 graphics card, which has finally enabled video game wire-frame artists to digitally sculpt breasts as small as B-cups.

— from New Video Game Technology Finally Allows Rendering of Small Breasts

More Oniony goodness:

STOCKHOLM—In recognition of her groundbreaking work treating life- threatening diseases of the privates, renowned hoo-ha specialist Dr. Victoria Lazoff was awarded the Nobel Prize in Lady Medicine this week.

The world’s foremost authority on ailments down south, Lazoff led a team of cutting-edge hoo-ha doctors to develop new strategies for detecting abnormal growth in…you know, that area. The accomplished physician humbly accepted medicine’s highest honor before a crowd of her peers, and spoke about the importance of regular screenings to prevent unnecessary complications up inside one’s business.

— from Renowned Hoo-Ha Doctor Wins Nobel Prize for Medical Advancements Down There

New Prescription Fish Tank Eliminates Need for Glasses While Looking at Fish
Auction Won by Crab with $20 Stuck in Claw
That Cheesecake Sitting on the Table: What if it Accidentally Fell Into Your Mouth?
Last Few Republican Senators Form Roman Tortoise
Art Professor Revealed to Be Convincing Fake


— from First 10 Minutes of Chess Game Spent Explaining Replacement Pieces



The Shocking Blue Green Theme. Blog at WordPress.com.


Get every new post delivered to your Inbox.

Join 40 other followers

%d bloggers like this: